DEAR ABBY: My wife and I were married 21 years ago. Since then, she has admitted to cheating with 10 different men. Every time, I stayed together with her, hoping she’d change. I finally left 3 1/2 years ago because I couldn’t take it anymore. She became homeless, but for the past yr and a half she has been living with my daughter and me because I saw her on the road at some point and he or she looked terrible.
We at the moment are moving, and my daughter wants her mother to get a job (she’s able to getting one). My ex refused to get one to assist pay the bills. Now I’m faced with one other dilemma: Should I let her go on her own or fight for her to stick with us? My daughter is totally against her living with us. My income is restricted. I’m on disability for a foul heart. My ex is 43, and I’m 58. Are you able to please advise? — NOT LOOKING BACK IN COLORADO
DEAR NOT LOOKING BACK: Your daughter is correct. You might be disabled and on a limited income, and your ex-wife is able-bodied. Along with her out of there, your expenses can be lower. Nowhere in your letter did you mention that you simply still love this parasite, nor did you mention whether she has modified her ways. Your responsibility for her ended when the wedding did. Encourage her to achieve out to her relatives for a spot to remain, or guide her to a shelter. But not only must you let her go, you have to find the strength to insist upon it.
DEAR ABBY: I consider myself a modest woman in today’s world. I actually have a recent granddaughter that my daughter-in-law nurses anywhere, at any time, no matter who she is around. I told my son she should cover herself in restaurants and other public places. I get embarrassed when she just pulls out a breast for anyone to see. She’s European, and I understand it’s more common there, but not a lot in America. Am I overreacting? — LOOKING AWAY IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR LOOKING AWAY: I believe so. Nursing moms are not any longer relegated to feeding their infants in bathrooms as they were years ago. Nevertheless, because you’re embarrassed on the sight of your daughter-in-law nursing, consider leaving the table until she is finished to preserve your modesty.
DEAR ABBY: Often I find myself seated near individuals who either speak too loudly or talk always without stopping, each of which annoy me. This normally happens in restaurants, after I’m attempting to enjoy a pleasant meal, even though it also happened recently on a train. My seatmate was talking to the passenger across the aisle. What may be done in such situations, hopefully in a polite way? — TRYING TO RELAX
DEAR TRYING: A restaurant patron can quietly ask to maneuver his or her seat to a quieter location. On public transportation, you need to have offered to provide your seat to the person across the aisle so your seat partner could proceed the conversation without shouting across.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also often called Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.