Are you able to bring sexy back to a neighborhood that was never sexy to start with?
The starry duo of Justin Timberlake and Tiger Woods are betting they’ll with their cavernous latest Midtown sports bar, T-Squared Social, which opened Wednesday and is situated on that famously throbbing hub of Latest York nightlife — er, East forty second Street.
The golfer and the pop star, who’re apparently tighter than Laverne and Shirley, decided to collaborate on the enterprise during a round of golf on a luxe private course within the Bahamas. As one does.
The 22,000-square-foot T-Squared (Tiger and Timberlake, hardy har har), which is the swanky neighbor to a boarded-up sandwich shop and a Sephora, wears a variety of hats.
And I’m not only talking Mets, Yankees, Jets and Giants caps.
First, it’s a craft cocktail bar with drinks created by knowledgeable mixologist which might be given golf-y names just like the Back 9 Hot Toddy and the Pimm’s-based 7 Rings ($21 each). There’s a theatrical Smoked Old Fashioned ($21). Additionally they serve high-end Champagne for as much as $700 a bottle. Try going to Connolly’s nearby and ordering the Krug. I dare you.
The bar features full-swing golf simulators, a bowling alley and dart boards. Stefano Giovannini for N.Y.Post
The Smoked Old Fashioned ($21) at T-Squared has a highly theatrical presentation.Stefano Giovannini for N.Y.Post
Then it’s a swell place to observe the sport in your technique to Grand Central after work. There are greater than 30 TVs across the large space, including what they claim is the most important digital screen in Latest York, at 200 inches.
That hulking television — the very best within the bar — unfortunately is behind 11 exclusive, reservable tables cordoned by a velvet rope to scare off us plebs. T-Squared, which is a component of the Nexus collection of members-only sporty clubs, is hoping to snag subscribers for $250 per quarter.
Hungry? T-Squared just so happens to be a gastropub. The very tasty and messy Madison Avenue burger ($32) is topped with caramelized onions, Comté cheese and a red-wine-based bordelaise sauce. No Heinz for you! A filling pork belly appetizer ($23) has three different preparations, including with salty hoisin sauce and spicy bacon.
The tasty Madison Avenue burger ($32) is topped with caramelized onions, bordelaise sauce and Comté cheese.Stefano Giovannini for N.Y.Post
Pork belly is ready three alternative ways on this appetizer. Stefano Giovannini for N.Y.Post
The chopped cheese costs $19 and is … the exact same as a $5 bodega chopped cheese. For nearly $20 the query isn’t “Where’s the meat?” it’s “Where’s the Wagyu?”
Good God, this place is an arcade, too. There are 4 full-swing golf simulators, a mini bowling alley by the forty second Street entrance and dart boards on the forty third Street side. Oh yeah, T-Squared is so huge there are doors on two blocks.
Yes, it’s got a record-breaking TV screen, elevated grub and specialty drinks.
The difficulty is that atmospherically, the establishment hews closer to Woods’ personality than Timberlake’s. Translation: It doesn’t have one.
The 22,000-square-foot T-Squared (Tiger and Timberlake, hardy har har), which is the swanky neighbor to a boarded-up sandwich shop and a Sephora, wears a variety of hats. Stefano Giovannini for N.Y.Post
A large 200-inch TV screen, said to be the most important in Latest York, is situated behind a velvet rope.Stefano Giovannini for N.Y.Post
There’s only one important bar on the front, by the East forty second Street entrance.Stefano Giovannini for N.Y.Post
Almost an airport lounge, the bar waffles between a high-end indulgence and the domain of popped-collar office bros named Chad. While it’s split up into many separate zones, there’s only a single bar area that can inevitably be mobbed when it’s put to the test throughout the Ryder Cup, which starts Sept. 29.
In a neighborhood known for its beloved, if struggling, Irish pubs, this shiny latest watering hole is in dire need of a more convivial vibe. And maybe it is going to eventually find one.
But, unlike a soothing 18 holes of golf, you possibly can’t take your time within the cutthroat world of Latest York nightlife.