A lady has confessed to Reddit users that she refuses to go on vacation together with her disabled friend — and most of the people don’t blame her.
The unnamed woman posted her story to the “Am I The A – -hole” subreddit, explaining she not desired to holiday together with her childhood friend, whom she called “Ashley,” following a troubling first trip they took together.
The 2 of them, each of their 30s, have known one another since they were 13 years old and stayed in contact despite drifting apart after highschool.
“We planned to go on a brief vacation together to town which was Ashley’s idea, we planned this over a yr upfront to remain for 3 nights,” the post began.
The girl shared that Ashley is disabled and has fibromyalgia, a chronic disorder that causes widespread pain and tenderness everywhere in the body in addition to fatigue and sleep troubles, in line with the National Institute of Arthritis and Musculoskeletal and Skin Diseases.
She admitted that while their first and only vacation together wasn’t exactly horrible, she “found being around Ashley stressful.”
In response to the girl, Ashley “extremely overpacked,” bringing seven outfits, multiple varieties of hair dryers and other stuff “that just wasn’t needed.”
Ashley “was all the time complaining about how heavy her bags are. She insisted on going for long walks through town but then would get drained and say we want to get a taxi home as she will be able to’t walk back.”
Nevertheless, she said the ultimate straw for her was Ashley’s “full-on meltdown” on the train station once they were on the point of go home.
“We got to the desk and she or he asked the staff if there was a wheelchair available she could use as she was struggling to walk any further to get to her platform,” the Reddit user wrote. “They said they were all getting used and asked if she booked assistance and she or he hadn’t, they usually told her a chair must be available in around an hour.”
“Ashley lost her cool and yelled at them and said that she’s going to miss her train, and she or he sat on the ground. I attempted to calm her down but there was just no use. She was very insulting and called them names, it was so embarrassing.”
The girl stayed with Ashley until a manager eventually arrived with a wheelchair. The manager assisted Ashley and she or he went home.
Two days later, once they were each home, Ashley asked the girl if she desired to do an analogous vacation the next yr — to which the poster responded “no thanks.”
“I attempted to clarify to her that I feel after our experience it’s higher if we don’t vacation together. Ashley is now offended with me and said I’m being ableist but I struggle to place up with how disorganised she is with regard to her own needs,” she wrote.
In response to the poster’s inquiry, “AITA for refusing to vacation with my disabled friend anymore?,” Reddit users largely agreed that she shouldn’t be the a – – hole.
“Her behavior has nothing to do with a disability in order that shouldn’t even be mentioned, except where she tried to make it an excuse (gross),” one person commented.
“Agreed, I even have MS. I do know I can only walk a lot every day, so I plan my life around what I can do. Once I overdo it, it’s my fault. I don’t abuse others because I didn’t budget my limitations properly,” one other chimed in.
“Being disabled doesn’t mean she will be able to throw tantrums and disparage people to get her way,” one other declared.
“NTA – you aren’t being an ableist. You’re selecting to not vacation with someone who was not properly prepared for the trip and who caused a scene after not making the essential reservations. It has nothing to do together with her illness,” a separate user wrote.
Someone who said additionally they have fibromyalgia wrote that she “feels bad” for the poster and she or he shouldn’t be the a – – hole.
“She should know she will be able to’t do all that walking, and all that overpacking, and none of that carrying, guuurl, carrying must be a NO,” she wrote. “But rattling, that feels like someone who doesn’t know the best way to assess her own physical capabilities and limits. Poor summer child desires to do it again, oooh no, baby, nooo.”