Americans are selecting to stay in a living situation with their exes amidst the continued housing crisis, a move that experts say may prove emotionally taxing despite the potential financial advantages.
“High housing costs are causing more couples to cohabitate despite the actual fact the romantic flames of their marriage have been extinguished,” real estate broker Chuck Vander Stelt told Fox News Digital.
“I actually have had conversations with several divorcing couples who’ve been weighing options and looking out to time the market. Within the meantime, they’re continuing to live together.”
Stelt believes the trend of cohabitation after divorce or breakups is growing as he has experienced an influx of those of their 30s and 40s, often with children, weighing the choices of selling versus cohabitating. Up to now, Stelt said homeowners who separated were adamant that the property needs to be sold as soon as possible.
“Many owners are sitting on a mortgage with a all-time low rate of interest and a snug house payment. It’s hard to let that go and face the choice of meaningfully higher housing costs,” he added.
The inclination to stay shacked up with former lovers has been reported within the media over the past several years, especially amid the fallout from the COVID-19 pandemic.
Relationship advice web sites and message boards, similar to Reddit, are full of pagers where renters and homeowners have asked whether or not they should remain of their current living situation.
American couples are continuing to live together despite break up on account of high housing costs. Getty Images
Americans have even documented their experiences living with exes on TikTok, offering advice to those facing an identical conundrum.
TikToker @-diaryofamomma posted quite a lot of videos in late 2023 where she showed what life is like if you live with an ex and also you share two children. The son and daughter typically stick with the mother in a single room while the dad sleeps on the couch.
The mom, “Cassie,” said they still live together because the owner wouldn’t allow them to interrupt the lease without paying for the remaining of the term in full. They each share responsibility for the youngsters and clean the home.
“Truthfully, me and their dad like – consider a foul roommate. Any person you don’t like but you’ve to live with because you’ve a lease together. Like, that’s what we’re,” Cassie said. “I try to not hassle him. He doesn’t hassle me.”
Dating coach Deon Black said the explanations people decide to live with their exes often boil right down to the three F’s: funds, familiarity, and fear.
“The fee of moving out could be prohibitive, especially considering current real estate prices. And let’s not forget the contractual obligations that sometimes bind people together like super glue — rental contracts signed in happier times that now seem as unbreakable as a foul habit,” he said.
Black said while not an earth-shattering trend, exes living together is indeed a growing phenomenon created out of necessity, more so than alternative.
“Millennials are leading this charge, followed closely by Gen Z. Younger generations are most affected by this trend on account of economic pressures,” he said.
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Amid rising rates of interest and housing shortages, Black said Americans are attempting to get monetary savings and maintain stability, especially if kids are involved. However the possible downside is substantial, with the dating coach citing the potential for emotional stress, conflict and the problem of moving on.
After living together with her ex, TikToker Alana Hogan offered tricks to those embroiled in the identical living situation.
“Everyone seems to be going to heal in alternative ways and everybody has different coping strategies. Your way goes to be entirely different to his or her way,” she said.
She urged her followers to not view their former partner’s actions as a mirrored image of themselves and to set healthy boundaries of where every person will probably be within the apartment or house.
“Be really clear and open along with your communication. Allow them to know what you’re feeling comfortable with, what you don’t feel comfortable with. What you’re feeling open about talking about and what you don’t,” she added.
Viral relationship coach Jake Maddock previously addressed the thought of living with an ex, stressing that deciding to remain under the identical roof means you’re still technically in a relationship.
“You possibly can’t emotionally separate and never physically separate. You could have to separate physically as well,” he said.
Sexologist Suzannah Weiss concurred with the concept that it is normally easier for people to have a “clean break” and keep exes out of their lives following a breakup.
Weiss noted that some people might comply with live with their exes temporarily because they’re busy with work, allowing this era to tug on and not using a determined expiration date. Others live in rent-controlled apartments and can’t find something inexpensive once they cut things off, resulting in decisions “born out of convenience.”
“Nevertheless, sometimes, people keep living with their exes because they’re afraid to completely let go. They might tell themselves it’s for convenience or for financial reasons, but the reality is that they’re terrified to be completely without this person,” she told Fox News Digital.
