DEAR ABBY: I used to be shocked at your response to “Hosted Out” (March 28), who was frustrated at having to host, feed and entertain her husband’s hunting buddy and his wife several times a yr.
I agreed along with your suggestion that she stay elsewhere while these friends stay at her home so her husband will (hopefully) see the sunshine when he’s the one doing the cooking and hosting.
But you then made the comment that you would be able to’t consider the friend’s wife doesn’t help with the cooking and entertaining, and the way lazy and insensitive she should be. Abby, did you get caught in a time warp?
Why would you’re thinking that that the hunting buddy gets a free pass from cooking and helping during their stay when HE is the one receiving all the advantages? And the way could you most likely criticize his wife, the innocent bystander?
Are you truthfully stating that it’s HER JOB to cook and clean for those guys because she’s a girl? I’m hoping you’ve gotten now returned to the 2020s. — JULIE IN COLORADO
DEAR JULIE: I received numerous criticism for the comment I made at the tip of my answer to “Hosted Out” — enough cold water to moisten the wet noodle I take advantage of for self-flagellation. Read on:
DEAR ABBY: I used to be flabbergasted that you’re thinking that the wife of the visiting couple deserved more blame than either of the 2 men.
All three are guilty for allowing this to go on. “Hosted Out” wrote that she doesn’t need to spoil the friendship. Wouldn’t fleeing to a hotel try this form of damage?
When my husband and I host visitors for greater than three days, I explain to them early on that this “entitles them to be family.”
I tell them where the food and supplies are, that everyone seems to be “on their very own” for breakfast and lunch, but that we are going to all work together to organize a sit-down dinner each night.
My guests all the time appear to be relieved after I share this plan. — SHERI IN WASHINGTON
DEAR SHERI: I wish I’d made that suggestion …
DEAR ABBY: You beneficial that “Hosted Out” leave her home when those guests visit. Why should she have to depart to accommodate these clueless people?
An honest, caring approach to the chums, stating that she has decided to in the reduction of on the number of tourists and time hosting, should suffice. — BEVERLY IN MICHIGAN
DEAR BEVERLY: I feel if she did that, she would get quite a little bit of pushback from her hunting-loving hubby!
DEAR ABBY: Why does all of the work fall to the wives? Perhaps next time, “Hosted Out” should plan only meals her husband has to barbecue. — KAREN IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR KAREN: Years ago, the business of entertaining mostly did fall on the shoulders of the womenfolk. Today, with so many ladies within the workplace, these responsibilities are frequently shared. I need to thank my readers for reminding me of that.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also often known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
DEAR ABBY: I used to be shocked at your response to “Hosted Out” (March 28), who was frustrated at having to host, feed and entertain her husband’s hunting buddy and his wife several times a yr.
I agreed along with your suggestion that she stay elsewhere while these friends stay at her home so her husband will (hopefully) see the sunshine when he’s the one doing the cooking and hosting.
But you then made the comment that you would be able to’t consider the friend’s wife doesn’t help with the cooking and entertaining, and the way lazy and insensitive she should be. Abby, did you get caught in a time warp?
Why would you’re thinking that that the hunting buddy gets a free pass from cooking and helping during their stay when HE is the one receiving all the advantages? And the way could you most likely criticize his wife, the innocent bystander?
Are you truthfully stating that it’s HER JOB to cook and clean for those guys because she’s a girl? I’m hoping you’ve gotten now returned to the 2020s. — JULIE IN COLORADO
DEAR JULIE: I received numerous criticism for the comment I made at the tip of my answer to “Hosted Out” — enough cold water to moisten the wet noodle I take advantage of for self-flagellation. Read on:
DEAR ABBY: I used to be flabbergasted that you’re thinking that the wife of the visiting couple deserved more blame than either of the 2 men.
All three are guilty for allowing this to go on. “Hosted Out” wrote that she doesn’t need to spoil the friendship. Wouldn’t fleeing to a hotel try this form of damage?
When my husband and I host visitors for greater than three days, I explain to them early on that this “entitles them to be family.”
I tell them where the food and supplies are, that everyone seems to be “on their very own” for breakfast and lunch, but that we are going to all work together to organize a sit-down dinner each night.
My guests all the time appear to be relieved after I share this plan. — SHERI IN WASHINGTON
DEAR SHERI: I wish I’d made that suggestion …
DEAR ABBY: You beneficial that “Hosted Out” leave her home when those guests visit. Why should she have to depart to accommodate these clueless people?
An honest, caring approach to the chums, stating that she has decided to in the reduction of on the number of tourists and time hosting, should suffice. — BEVERLY IN MICHIGAN
DEAR BEVERLY: I feel if she did that, she would get quite a little bit of pushback from her hunting-loving hubby!
DEAR ABBY: Why does all of the work fall to the wives? Perhaps next time, “Hosted Out” should plan only meals her husband has to barbecue. — KAREN IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR KAREN: Years ago, the business of entertaining mostly did fall on the shoulders of the womenfolk. Today, with so many ladies within the workplace, these responsibilities are frequently shared. I need to thank my readers for reminding me of that.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also often known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
