DEAR ABBY: I’m a 55-year-old father of a 7-year-old child. My social skills and experience are rusty resulting from graduate school and post-graduate training years (12 years, to be exact) without much social interaction. I imagine I missed a chance to bond with our 7-year-old.
Five years ago, my wife and I bumped into a Hall of Fame ballplayer. I became so starstruck that I couldn’t stop blurting out how incredible I assumed he was. It didn’t go over well.
Fast-forward to today: My child’s classmate happens to be the kid of yet one more superstar. My wife told me, “Don’t engage or refer to them.” She said she’d handle every thing.
Well, I believe I could have followed her instructions too literally and got here across as rude or dismissive by not chatting with them. I’m afraid they might think I’m a snob or a jerk. How can I dig myself out of the outlet I could have placed myself in? Because they’re celebrities, I don’t need to invade their privacy.
I sent a vacation greeting to the e-mail address shared in the varsity parent directory. No response. How should I interpret the non-response? Was my greeting delivered? Read? I even have their text number, but I don’t need to harass these people. — LOVING DAD IN THE SOUTH
DEAR LOVING DAD: Celebrities often receive greetings from fans they don’t know. Since you didn’t receive a response to yours, it is feasible the celebrity didn’t see it, or was too inundated to reply. That your message went unanswered shouldn’t be considered a private rejection. Don’t text the person. Simply quit second-guessing yourself. You haven’t committed a social faux pas.
In the longer term, keep in mind that celebrities are frequently similar to the remaining of us, albeit higher known. If you encounter one, remain calm. Smile and say hello just as you’d the couple who live across the road. Doing that will not be harassment, it’s being friendly.
DEAR ABBY: My father passed away five months ago. His wife has been unbearable to take care of and is controlling all elements of any funeral arrangements. Throughout the technique of my father getting sick after which being placed in hospice, I actually have gone above and beyond to help her with any of her needs.
My daughter is in school out of state, and with a view to receive year-round tuition, she must stay on campus year-round. The schedule of my daughter’s temporary job position plus taking break day when my father was sick made it difficult for her to return home at any given time.
My father’s wife refused to compromise with me on a day that might work higher for my daughter to attend the funeral. Because of this, my daughter missed her grandfather’s funeral. How can I get past my hurt and resentment? — RESENTFUL IN ILLINOIS
DEAR RESENTFUL: Please accept my sympathy for the lack of your father. That your daughter needed to miss her grandfather’s funeral is regrettable, but the explanation is comprehensible. Please remind yourself that your father’s wife can also be grieving and isn’t her best at the moment. Do you already know why she couldn’t or wouldn’t change the date of your father’s funeral to accommodate your daughter? Before starting a rift, the 2 of you must have a chat.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also often known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
DEAR ABBY: I’m a 55-year-old father of a 7-year-old child. My social skills and experience are rusty resulting from graduate school and post-graduate training years (12 years, to be exact) without much social interaction. I imagine I missed a chance to bond with our 7-year-old.
Five years ago, my wife and I bumped into a Hall of Fame ballplayer. I became so starstruck that I couldn’t stop blurting out how incredible I assumed he was. It didn’t go over well.
Fast-forward to today: My child’s classmate happens to be the kid of yet one more superstar. My wife told me, “Don’t engage or refer to them.” She said she’d handle every thing.
Well, I believe I could have followed her instructions too literally and got here across as rude or dismissive by not chatting with them. I’m afraid they might think I’m a snob or a jerk. How can I dig myself out of the outlet I could have placed myself in? Because they’re celebrities, I don’t need to invade their privacy.
I sent a vacation greeting to the e-mail address shared in the varsity parent directory. No response. How should I interpret the non-response? Was my greeting delivered? Read? I even have their text number, but I don’t need to harass these people. — LOVING DAD IN THE SOUTH
DEAR LOVING DAD: Celebrities often receive greetings from fans they don’t know. Since you didn’t receive a response to yours, it is feasible the celebrity didn’t see it, or was too inundated to reply. That your message went unanswered shouldn’t be considered a private rejection. Don’t text the person. Simply quit second-guessing yourself. You haven’t committed a social faux pas.
In the longer term, keep in mind that celebrities are frequently similar to the remaining of us, albeit higher known. If you encounter one, remain calm. Smile and say hello just as you’d the couple who live across the road. Doing that will not be harassment, it’s being friendly.
DEAR ABBY: My father passed away five months ago. His wife has been unbearable to take care of and is controlling all elements of any funeral arrangements. Throughout the technique of my father getting sick after which being placed in hospice, I actually have gone above and beyond to help her with any of her needs.
My daughter is in school out of state, and with a view to receive year-round tuition, she must stay on campus year-round. The schedule of my daughter’s temporary job position plus taking break day when my father was sick made it difficult for her to return home at any given time.
My father’s wife refused to compromise with me on a day that might work higher for my daughter to attend the funeral. Because of this, my daughter missed her grandfather’s funeral. How can I get past my hurt and resentment? — RESENTFUL IN ILLINOIS
DEAR RESENTFUL: Please accept my sympathy for the lack of your father. That your daughter needed to miss her grandfather’s funeral is regrettable, but the explanation is comprehensible. Please remind yourself that your father’s wife can also be grieving and isn’t her best at the moment. Do you already know why she couldn’t or wouldn’t change the date of your father’s funeral to accommodate your daughter? Before starting a rift, the 2 of you must have a chat.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also often known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
