DEAR FINALLY FED UP: I don’t know Jack, and you might have not listed even one in every of his virtues. Unless your idea of a completely satisfied future is supporting a recluse who refuses to carry a gradual job, it’s time to sing, “Hit the road, Jack!”
DEAR ABBY: My husband, “Randall,” was a widower after we met. His wife, “Sylvia,” had passed away in November 2010. We got married in October 2015. I recently was shocked to find that Randall has kept Sylvia’s Facebook page open, supposedly so his grandchildren can send her messages on her birthday or anytime they feel prefer it.
Last September, he posted a message that read: “Joyful Anniversary. Love you and miss you. 52 years today.” (If she were still living, that day would have marked 52 years of marriage.) Once I read it, I noticed that, in his heart, he still feels married to her. Am I improper for feeling that way? — ONE OF TWO WIVES
DEAR ONE: I don’t think you’re improper, but please understand that some people don’t completely recover from the death of a loved one, and your husband could also be one in every of them. It’s not that unusual, if my Facebook is any example. People post about their departed parents, grandparents and even their pets, and memorial pages on Facebook after an individual’s demise aren’t unusual. Should you and Randall have a very good marriage, I suggest you develop a humorousness about it. Sylvia isn’t a threat to you unless you make her one. Knowing which will lighten your load.
DEAR ABBY: I purchase pet food from a small local pet shop. (The shop doesn’t sell animals, only food and supplies. I support adoption.) I’m a daily customer and have been on a first-name basis with the owner, “Alicia,” for several years. Once I went to purchase my dog’s food the opposite day, she was wearing a shawl to cover her head. She has at all times had shoulder-length hair. It was obvious that she’s ailing. (I think breast cancer.) I didn’t know what to do. I hoped my face didn’t give me away. I just proceeded as I normally do — made small talk and accomplished my purchase.
The following time I am going there, should I proceed to act like I don’t notice? Should I ask Alicia if she’s ailing? I felt uncomfortable pretending not to note. Nevertheless, I feel it might be intrusive to say something. Please advise. — ANIMAL LOVER IN FLORIDA
DEAR ANIMAL LOVER: If Alicia wants to debate her medical condition with you, she is going to allude to it. If she does, hearken to her and offer a supportive comment. Many individuals seem unable to restrain themselves from asking inappropriate questions, nevertheless well-intentioned. Amongst them are likely a few of her other customers. Don’t be one in every of them.
DEAR ABBY: We’re a middle-aged couple who live together. I even have been with “Jack” for seven years, and through those seven years, he held down one job for under three months after which quit. I like him, but I don’t imagine the sensation is mutual if he can’t hold down a job and keep it. He never goes anywhere with me. Jack is a recluse. What should I do? Should I keep him or tell him it’s time to pack up and leave? — FINALLY FED UP IN OHIO
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also generally known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
DEAR FINALLY FED UP: I don’t know Jack, and you might have not listed even one in every of his virtues. Unless your idea of a completely satisfied future is supporting a recluse who refuses to carry a gradual job, it’s time to sing, “Hit the road, Jack!”
DEAR ABBY: My husband, “Randall,” was a widower after we met. His wife, “Sylvia,” had passed away in November 2010. We got married in October 2015. I recently was shocked to find that Randall has kept Sylvia’s Facebook page open, supposedly so his grandchildren can send her messages on her birthday or anytime they feel prefer it.
Last September, he posted a message that read: “Joyful Anniversary. Love you and miss you. 52 years today.” (If she were still living, that day would have marked 52 years of marriage.) Once I read it, I noticed that, in his heart, he still feels married to her. Am I improper for feeling that way? — ONE OF TWO WIVES
DEAR ONE: I don’t think you’re improper, but please understand that some people don’t completely recover from the death of a loved one, and your husband could also be one in every of them. It’s not that unusual, if my Facebook is any example. People post about their departed parents, grandparents and even their pets, and memorial pages on Facebook after an individual’s demise aren’t unusual. Should you and Randall have a very good marriage, I suggest you develop a humorousness about it. Sylvia isn’t a threat to you unless you make her one. Knowing which will lighten your load.
DEAR ABBY: I purchase pet food from a small local pet shop. (The shop doesn’t sell animals, only food and supplies. I support adoption.) I’m a daily customer and have been on a first-name basis with the owner, “Alicia,” for several years. Once I went to purchase my dog’s food the opposite day, she was wearing a shawl to cover her head. She has at all times had shoulder-length hair. It was obvious that she’s ailing. (I think breast cancer.) I didn’t know what to do. I hoped my face didn’t give me away. I just proceeded as I normally do — made small talk and accomplished my purchase.
The following time I am going there, should I proceed to act like I don’t notice? Should I ask Alicia if she’s ailing? I felt uncomfortable pretending not to note. Nevertheless, I feel it might be intrusive to say something. Please advise. — ANIMAL LOVER IN FLORIDA
DEAR ANIMAL LOVER: If Alicia wants to debate her medical condition with you, she is going to allude to it. If she does, hearken to her and offer a supportive comment. Many individuals seem unable to restrain themselves from asking inappropriate questions, nevertheless well-intentioned. Amongst them are likely a few of her other customers. Don’t be one in every of them.
DEAR ABBY: We’re a middle-aged couple who live together. I even have been with “Jack” for seven years, and through those seven years, he held down one job for under three months after which quit. I like him, but I don’t imagine the sensation is mutual if he can’t hold down a job and keep it. He never goes anywhere with me. Jack is a recluse. What should I do? Should I keep him or tell him it’s time to pack up and leave? — FINALLY FED UP IN OHIO
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also generally known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
