DEAR ABBY: I’m raising a granddaughter. We went to go to her aunt and cousin and had a pleasant day until my granddaughter told her aunt she should let her 5-year-old select her own clothes. My daughter became enraged and told me I needed to teach my granddaughter to respect adults. I told my daughter I didn’t think she should tell me tips on how to raise this child.
My daughter then began yelling and cursing and threw us out of her house. My granddaughter was distraught after being yelled at even after she apologized.
I even have thought for a few years that my daughter isn’t mentally healthy. I won’t expose my granddaughter to her aunt again. I might, nevertheless, like to keep up a reference to this daughter because I need a relationship with the 5-year-old. I’m willing to let this event go.
I do know my daughter thinks that is all my fault and he or she did nothing improper. She suffers from quite a lot of delusions, some related to social media. It has not been possible to get her help. I even have tried to encourage her husband, who’s just attempting to survive. I’m not quite sure what’s the appropriate thing to do. Please help. — ON EGGSHELLS IN NEW HAMPSHIRE
DEAR ON EGGSHELLS: When your unstable daughter told you to show your granddaughter to respect adults, it’s best to not have reacted by fanning the flames. When you want to have a relationship with the grandchild who lives with this daughter, apologize for the blow-up. It may also be smart to warn the granddaughter you’re raising that her aunt is “sensitive” to parenting advice, not to supply it again and to limit her exposure.
DEAR ABBY: Is it improper to say no a marriage reception invitation simply because you don’t want to attend? I even have received a “save the date” postcard from a co-worker’s daughter for her wedding. I don’t know this girl or her fiance, and I’m not particularly near her mother.
Where we live, a present of $150 per person is anticipated should you attend a marriage reception. My husband and I are on a good budget, and a $300 gift could be a sacrifice. As well as, my husband would need to take day without work work to attend and lose an evening’s income.
We attended her older daughter’s wedding seven years ago, but enough is enough. This may never be reciprocated, as our youngsters won’t be marrying. In the event that they did, I wouldn’t invite my co-workers to their weddings. Can I decline the invitation by saying we’re sorry, but we’re unable to attend? Or is it mandatory that we attend? — DON’T WANT TO IN ILLINOIS
DEAR DON’T WANT TO: An invite just isn’t a command performance! Since you don’t wish to go, and since it could create a financial hardship, check “won’t attend” on the RSVP card included with the invitation. It’s that easy. Although you won’t be obligated to spend $300, it could be nice should you sent the pleased couple a card wishing them a protracted and pleased marriage.
DEAR READERS: I wish you all a pleased and healthy Fourth of July. Please drive rigorously and have a good time safely.
P.S. Wishing a Joyful, Heavenly Birthday to you, Mom! — LOVE, ABBY
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also often known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
DEAR ABBY: I’m raising a granddaughter. We went to go to her aunt and cousin and had a pleasant day until my granddaughter told her aunt she should let her 5-year-old select her own clothes. My daughter became enraged and told me I needed to teach my granddaughter to respect adults. I told my daughter I didn’t think she should tell me tips on how to raise this child.
My daughter then began yelling and cursing and threw us out of her house. My granddaughter was distraught after being yelled at even after she apologized.
I even have thought for a few years that my daughter isn’t mentally healthy. I won’t expose my granddaughter to her aunt again. I might, nevertheless, like to keep up a reference to this daughter because I need a relationship with the 5-year-old. I’m willing to let this event go.
I do know my daughter thinks that is all my fault and he or she did nothing improper. She suffers from quite a lot of delusions, some related to social media. It has not been possible to get her help. I even have tried to encourage her husband, who’s just attempting to survive. I’m not quite sure what’s the appropriate thing to do. Please help. — ON EGGSHELLS IN NEW HAMPSHIRE
DEAR ON EGGSHELLS: When your unstable daughter told you to show your granddaughter to respect adults, it’s best to not have reacted by fanning the flames. When you want to have a relationship with the grandchild who lives with this daughter, apologize for the blow-up. It may also be smart to warn the granddaughter you’re raising that her aunt is “sensitive” to parenting advice, not to supply it again and to limit her exposure.
DEAR ABBY: Is it improper to say no a marriage reception invitation simply because you don’t want to attend? I even have received a “save the date” postcard from a co-worker’s daughter for her wedding. I don’t know this girl or her fiance, and I’m not particularly near her mother.
Where we live, a present of $150 per person is anticipated should you attend a marriage reception. My husband and I are on a good budget, and a $300 gift could be a sacrifice. As well as, my husband would need to take day without work work to attend and lose an evening’s income.
We attended her older daughter’s wedding seven years ago, but enough is enough. This may never be reciprocated, as our youngsters won’t be marrying. In the event that they did, I wouldn’t invite my co-workers to their weddings. Can I decline the invitation by saying we’re sorry, but we’re unable to attend? Or is it mandatory that we attend? — DON’T WANT TO IN ILLINOIS
DEAR DON’T WANT TO: An invite just isn’t a command performance! Since you don’t wish to go, and since it could create a financial hardship, check “won’t attend” on the RSVP card included with the invitation. It’s that easy. Although you won’t be obligated to spend $300, it could be nice should you sent the pleased couple a card wishing them a protracted and pleased marriage.
DEAR READERS: I wish you all a pleased and healthy Fourth of July. Please drive rigorously and have a good time safely.
P.S. Wishing a Joyful, Heavenly Birthday to you, Mom! — LOVE, ABBY
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also often known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
