DEAR ABBY: I even have been dating my man for seven years. After we got serious, he told me he had kids. Because we’re seniors, I assumed his kids were adults. I recently came upon that the youngsters are teenagers! He may be very involved of their lives.
The issue is, their mother calls him always about bills for her house and what the youngsters need. He pays her phone bill, water bill, electric bill and sometimes the web bill, in addition to giving her money every month for the youngsters. He says he does it because he doesn’t pay child support, and he desires to maintain his kids.
He says he’s not, under any circumstances, getting back along with the mom. He tells me he loves me, and he does show it. He says that when the youngsters graduate from highschool in two years, he can have no reason to confer with their mom or to pay her bills. He wants his kids to depart and go to school.
I’m very concerned about our relationship moving forward. He gives me a variety of details about what happens between the mom, the youngsters and him. The girl is dangerous and volatile. She has come at him with a knife twice. Should I hang in there for the following two years or move on? I like him very much. — SUSPENDED IN FLORIDA
DEAR SUSPENDED: Hang in there, but understand that the time has come so that you can discuss all of this along with your gentleman friend. Suggest he confer with a family law attorney now about his children’s higher education. In some states, laws or case law gives courts the authority to order a non-custodial parent to pay for some form of faculty expenses.
As to his children’s unstable mother, you may bet that when he stops footing her bills, she’s going to be one indignant woman. If she threatens his life again, he should immediately report her to the police and seek a restraining or no-contact order.
DEAR ABBY: My friend had back surgery that has left her walking with a walker or a cane. We exit to eat very often. When the hostess takes us to our seats, they often take us to a table that’s removed from the door, bypassing many empty tables. Sometimes, we’ve even needed to go up or down some steps.
I do know they’ve a system for seating in a restaurant, nevertheless it sure could be nice in the event that they’d recognize her difficulty in maneuvering and seat us closer to the doorway or exit. I’m sure many individuals have this issue. I might say something, but my friend says it could embarrass her. How do others solve this problem? — BETTER ACCESS NEEDED IN IOWA
DEAR ACCESS: Others resolve the issue by informing the restaurant on the time the reservation is made that a member of the party has a disability and wishes quick access not only to the doorway and exit, but in addition to the table. When you and this friend are walk-ins with no reservation, discreetly inform the host where it is advisable be seated. It could be to the restaurant’s advantage to avoid the potential liability of a visit and fall by not forcing this guest to maneuver through an obstacle course.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also referred to as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
DEAR ABBY: I even have been dating my man for seven years. After we got serious, he told me he had kids. Because we’re seniors, I assumed his kids were adults. I recently came upon that the youngsters are teenagers! He may be very involved of their lives.
The issue is, their mother calls him always about bills for her house and what the youngsters need. He pays her phone bill, water bill, electric bill and sometimes the web bill, in addition to giving her money every month for the youngsters. He says he does it because he doesn’t pay child support, and he desires to maintain his kids.
He says he’s not, under any circumstances, getting back along with the mom. He tells me he loves me, and he does show it. He says that when the youngsters graduate from highschool in two years, he can have no reason to confer with their mom or to pay her bills. He wants his kids to depart and go to school.
I’m very concerned about our relationship moving forward. He gives me a variety of details about what happens between the mom, the youngsters and him. The girl is dangerous and volatile. She has come at him with a knife twice. Should I hang in there for the following two years or move on? I like him very much. — SUSPENDED IN FLORIDA
DEAR SUSPENDED: Hang in there, but understand that the time has come so that you can discuss all of this along with your gentleman friend. Suggest he confer with a family law attorney now about his children’s higher education. In some states, laws or case law gives courts the authority to order a non-custodial parent to pay for some form of faculty expenses.
As to his children’s unstable mother, you may bet that when he stops footing her bills, she’s going to be one indignant woman. If she threatens his life again, he should immediately report her to the police and seek a restraining or no-contact order.
DEAR ABBY: My friend had back surgery that has left her walking with a walker or a cane. We exit to eat very often. When the hostess takes us to our seats, they often take us to a table that’s removed from the door, bypassing many empty tables. Sometimes, we’ve even needed to go up or down some steps.
I do know they’ve a system for seating in a restaurant, nevertheless it sure could be nice in the event that they’d recognize her difficulty in maneuvering and seat us closer to the doorway or exit. I’m sure many individuals have this issue. I might say something, but my friend says it could embarrass her. How do others solve this problem? — BETTER ACCESS NEEDED IN IOWA
DEAR ACCESS: Others resolve the issue by informing the restaurant on the time the reservation is made that a member of the party has a disability and wishes quick access not only to the doorway and exit, but in addition to the table. When you and this friend are walk-ins with no reservation, discreetly inform the host where it is advisable be seated. It could be to the restaurant’s advantage to avoid the potential liability of a visit and fall by not forcing this guest to maneuver through an obstacle course.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also referred to as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
