DEAR ABBY: My son and his fiancee are getting married next month. They’re calling it an elopement, but although they’ve been telling everyone when and where the marriage is, they will not be formally inviting anyone. I actually have come to terms with that. I realize the day is about them, not me. Nevertheless, that is my only child, and I actually have at all times dreamed about being a part of this milestone in his life.
I’m sure that is his fiancee’s selection and he’s just going together with what she wants, nevertheless it is hurting me terribly to not be there. They’ve also decided a reception of their honor shall be held six months afterward. Who does this? Is that this proper etiquette? — BROKEN-HEARTED MOTHER
DEAR MOTHER: The rigid rules of etiquette have loosened considerably in recent times. Many younger people prefer the casual over the formal. Please don’t lay the only blame in your soon-to-be daughter-in-law without first discussing this together with your son, because you could be shocked to learn this nontraditional wedding is going on together with his enthusiastic blessing. If that’s the case, quietly let go of your “dream.”
As to not being together with your son on this big day, should you haven’t received a proper invitation, show up with a smile anyway and offer your services as a witness. Those that attend the marriage ought to be invited to the reception, and in the event that they attend the reception, they need to include a present in hand.
DEAR ABBY: We live in a retirement community. Lots of our friends have hearing loss that ranges from slight to profound. While most of them have the cash to travel the globe, they don’t spend money on hearing aids, which confounds us.
In restaurants, they keep bending their ears toward us and saying “Eh?” to only about every word. We’re careful to enunciate clearly for his or her profit, nevertheless it doesn’t help much. Our natural inclination is to talk louder, which has embarrassed us several times as other diners grew quiet and turned to take a look at us.
On essentially the most recent occasion, I brought somewhat notebook and pen in my purse, and after I wrote out a few responses, the wife looked offended. It didn’t feel comfortable, but I believed it might be higher than yelling or avoiding conversation altogether.
We discover ourselves declining invitations with them more often in favor of electronic communication. These are delightful people otherwise. We’re just undecided find out how to handle this. Do you’ve got any suggestions? — WORKING EARS IN FLORIDA
DEAR WORKING EARS: Yes, I do. Tell these people privately that they might must get their hearing checked because you might be having to shout whenever you exit in public. Hearing loss happens to many seniors, and those that have the issue can find themselves increasingly isolated. This is the reason it’s so necessary to seek the advice of an audiologist whenever you start noticing a necessity to boost the amount on the tv, or you regularly need to ask people to repeat what they’ve said to you.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also generally known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
DEAR ABBY: My son and his fiancee are getting married next month. They’re calling it an elopement, but although they’ve been telling everyone when and where the marriage is, they will not be formally inviting anyone. I actually have come to terms with that. I realize the day is about them, not me. Nevertheless, that is my only child, and I actually have at all times dreamed about being a part of this milestone in his life.
I’m sure that is his fiancee’s selection and he’s just going together with what she wants, nevertheless it is hurting me terribly to not be there. They’ve also decided a reception of their honor shall be held six months afterward. Who does this? Is that this proper etiquette? — BROKEN-HEARTED MOTHER
DEAR MOTHER: The rigid rules of etiquette have loosened considerably in recent times. Many younger people prefer the casual over the formal. Please don’t lay the only blame in your soon-to-be daughter-in-law without first discussing this together with your son, because you could be shocked to learn this nontraditional wedding is going on together with his enthusiastic blessing. If that’s the case, quietly let go of your “dream.”
As to not being together with your son on this big day, should you haven’t received a proper invitation, show up with a smile anyway and offer your services as a witness. Those that attend the marriage ought to be invited to the reception, and in the event that they attend the reception, they need to include a present in hand.
DEAR ABBY: We live in a retirement community. Lots of our friends have hearing loss that ranges from slight to profound. While most of them have the cash to travel the globe, they don’t spend money on hearing aids, which confounds us.
In restaurants, they keep bending their ears toward us and saying “Eh?” to only about every word. We’re careful to enunciate clearly for his or her profit, nevertheless it doesn’t help much. Our natural inclination is to talk louder, which has embarrassed us several times as other diners grew quiet and turned to take a look at us.
On essentially the most recent occasion, I brought somewhat notebook and pen in my purse, and after I wrote out a few responses, the wife looked offended. It didn’t feel comfortable, but I believed it might be higher than yelling or avoiding conversation altogether.
We discover ourselves declining invitations with them more often in favor of electronic communication. These are delightful people otherwise. We’re just undecided find out how to handle this. Do you’ve got any suggestions? — WORKING EARS IN FLORIDA
DEAR WORKING EARS: Yes, I do. Tell these people privately that they might must get their hearing checked because you might be having to shout whenever you exit in public. Hearing loss happens to many seniors, and those that have the issue can find themselves increasingly isolated. This is the reason it’s so necessary to seek the advice of an audiologist whenever you start noticing a necessity to boost the amount on the tv, or you regularly need to ask people to repeat what they’ve said to you.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also generally known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
