DEAR ABBY: I met a girl online from out of state, and we hit it off. We dated for 3 years before she moved here and we were married. At the moment, she was estranged from her family. She recently began to repair her relationship with a daughter and would visit her. Our marriage had been showing just a few cracks as her emotional state was growing worse as a consequence of her loneliness. She worked from home, and I worked some extra time to complement our income.
With my blessing, she has since moved to her daughter’s state to be near her grandkids. I are not looking for to travel to maintain a wedding going. I’m too old to try this. She has medical issues, so she advantages from my insurance.
We’ve been married only a 12 months and a half. If I bring up a divorce due to travel and the incontrovertible fact that we now have grown apart, I’m afraid she’ll ask for half my pension that I’ve worked my whole life for. What do you advise? — FEELING STUCK IN MISSOURI
DEAR FEELING STUCK: I urge you to debate this matter with a family law attorney licensed to practice within the state of Missouri. I’m not a lawyer (obviously), but from where I sit on the West Coast, it appears your wife deserted you when she moved away to be closer to her daughter, and your marriage has died in its infancy. I wish you luck. (Please let me understand how this seems.)
DEAR ABBY: By some means I became the go-to person for everybody in my family — siblings in addition to parents. I actually have the means, and for many years, I actually have been glad to assist. I recently lost a brother, and I assumed the people I’ve been there for can be there to support me.
Abby, they ALL failed. Two didn’t show up in any respect, and two got here and left so fast my head spun. It was a two-part ceremony. My gathering was the primary. I used to be so hurt I didn’t need to go to the second gathering, but I desired to honor my brother, so I went. Bad decision. My deceased brother had one enemy, and that person was invited to talk and ruined it ALL for me.
My husband was so upset he told my family off and said that I had been crying for days. Nobody cared enough to contact me to clear things up. As an alternative, they doubled down and called me selfish for needing them to be there for me.
Now I’m hurt and upset, and I don’t have any family to show to. Truthfully, it’s nothing recent, but I feel I’m so hurt because I feel that is the tip of family functions without end. What do you’re thinking that? — FULL OF EMOTION
DEAR FULL: I’m sorry to your loss. Because you’ve been the family rescuer and in return were treated with disrespect and indifference, you’ve every right to be upset. I hope that in the long run you’ll begin to develop relationships with individuals who show some reciprocity. Since you appear to come back from a family of “takers,” enlarging your circle provides you with a greater likelihood of getting healthier (not to say more rewarding) relationships. Please consider it.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also referred to as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
DEAR ABBY: I met a girl online from out of state, and we hit it off. We dated for 3 years before she moved here and we were married. At the moment, she was estranged from her family. She recently began to repair her relationship with a daughter and would visit her. Our marriage had been showing just a few cracks as her emotional state was growing worse as a consequence of her loneliness. She worked from home, and I worked some extra time to complement our income.
With my blessing, she has since moved to her daughter’s state to be near her grandkids. I are not looking for to travel to maintain a wedding going. I’m too old to try this. She has medical issues, so she advantages from my insurance.
We’ve been married only a 12 months and a half. If I bring up a divorce due to travel and the incontrovertible fact that we now have grown apart, I’m afraid she’ll ask for half my pension that I’ve worked my whole life for. What do you advise? — FEELING STUCK IN MISSOURI
DEAR FEELING STUCK: I urge you to debate this matter with a family law attorney licensed to practice within the state of Missouri. I’m not a lawyer (obviously), but from where I sit on the West Coast, it appears your wife deserted you when she moved away to be closer to her daughter, and your marriage has died in its infancy. I wish you luck. (Please let me understand how this seems.)
DEAR ABBY: By some means I became the go-to person for everybody in my family — siblings in addition to parents. I actually have the means, and for many years, I actually have been glad to assist. I recently lost a brother, and I assumed the people I’ve been there for can be there to support me.
Abby, they ALL failed. Two didn’t show up in any respect, and two got here and left so fast my head spun. It was a two-part ceremony. My gathering was the primary. I used to be so hurt I didn’t need to go to the second gathering, but I desired to honor my brother, so I went. Bad decision. My deceased brother had one enemy, and that person was invited to talk and ruined it ALL for me.
My husband was so upset he told my family off and said that I had been crying for days. Nobody cared enough to contact me to clear things up. As an alternative, they doubled down and called me selfish for needing them to be there for me.
Now I’m hurt and upset, and I don’t have any family to show to. Truthfully, it’s nothing recent, but I feel I’m so hurt because I feel that is the tip of family functions without end. What do you’re thinking that? — FULL OF EMOTION
DEAR FULL: I’m sorry to your loss. Because you’ve been the family rescuer and in return were treated with disrespect and indifference, you’ve every right to be upset. I hope that in the long run you’ll begin to develop relationships with individuals who show some reciprocity. Since you appear to come back from a family of “takers,” enlarging your circle provides you with a greater likelihood of getting healthier (not to say more rewarding) relationships. Please consider it.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also referred to as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
