DEAR ABBY: I’ve been seeing “Ronald” for a bit greater than a 12 months. He’s nine years older than I’m, and we don’t really have rather a lot in common. He has feelings for me, but I don’t feel the identical toward him. He has helped me out rather a lot financially, and doesn’t expect me to pay him back.
The issue is, I actually have met another person. “Jack” and I actually have a lot in common. We knew lots of the identical people after we were younger. He recognized me after I showed him an image from my younger days. We each have feelings for one another. He’s a 12 months younger than I’m. I just don’t know what to do. Please help. — MIXED-UP IN THE SOUTH
DEAR MIXED-UP: Be an adult. Summon the courage to inform Ronald that you’ve reconnected with someone you knew years ago, and you prefer to to pursue it. Explain that you simply are being upfront because you are feeling it wouldn’t be fair or honest to maintain him at midnight. Then thank him for his friendship and his help, and tell him you’re grateful for the kindness and generosity he has shown you.
DEAR ABBY: My son is demanding that I tell his father and brother to call him to apologize for past behaviors and attitudes that hurt him. He says if I don’t, he’ll now not come home for any visits. He lives within the East; we’re within the Midwest. I actually have traveled alone to go to him, but it surely’s getting harder as my automotive and I age.
His father had alcohol issues in addition to mental health issues and was abusive, but has been sober for several years now. I actually have been in Al-Anon for greater than 25 years and still attend meetings. I don’t know how one can reply to my son’s demands. What’s your advice? — MEDIATING MOM IN IOWA
DEAR MOM: I don’t blame your son for avoiding individuals who cause him pain. Tell him that an apology that’s coerced is not any apology in any respect. A part of addiction recovery is the requirement to make amends to those the addict has wronged or hurt. Your husband has not done that, nor has your son’s brother. Proceed to go to your son so long as you may, but don’t allow him to involve you on this, since it won’t work.
DEAR ABBY: I’m being asked to donate to my grandchildren’s fundraisers for college activities like band, cheerleading, etc. This is occurring via email requests from a third-party site using their name. My issue is, I feel my grandchildren should ask me personally, or not less than warn me they’re raising money for his or her activity and I’ll be receiving an email. Am I improper to desire a personal request? — GROUCHY GRAN IN NEW MEXICO
DEAR GRAN: You aren’t improper. Nevertheless, this will likely be an instance of technology running amok. Once you receive a solicitation like this, pick up the phone, tell your grandchildren it showed up and make sure it’s legitimate. Make the conversation a friendly one and ask what’s happening with them, and should you feel like contributing, say so. At the tip of the conversation, remind them that you simply would love to listen to concerning the activity before receiving an automatic request for money.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also referred to as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
DEAR ABBY: I’ve been seeing “Ronald” for a bit greater than a 12 months. He’s nine years older than I’m, and we don’t really have rather a lot in common. He has feelings for me, but I don’t feel the identical toward him. He has helped me out rather a lot financially, and doesn’t expect me to pay him back.
The issue is, I actually have met another person. “Jack” and I actually have a lot in common. We knew lots of the identical people after we were younger. He recognized me after I showed him an image from my younger days. We each have feelings for one another. He’s a 12 months younger than I’m. I just don’t know what to do. Please help. — MIXED-UP IN THE SOUTH
DEAR MIXED-UP: Be an adult. Summon the courage to inform Ronald that you’ve reconnected with someone you knew years ago, and you prefer to to pursue it. Explain that you simply are being upfront because you are feeling it wouldn’t be fair or honest to maintain him at midnight. Then thank him for his friendship and his help, and tell him you’re grateful for the kindness and generosity he has shown you.
DEAR ABBY: My son is demanding that I tell his father and brother to call him to apologize for past behaviors and attitudes that hurt him. He says if I don’t, he’ll now not come home for any visits. He lives within the East; we’re within the Midwest. I actually have traveled alone to go to him, but it surely’s getting harder as my automotive and I age.
His father had alcohol issues in addition to mental health issues and was abusive, but has been sober for several years now. I actually have been in Al-Anon for greater than 25 years and still attend meetings. I don’t know how one can reply to my son’s demands. What’s your advice? — MEDIATING MOM IN IOWA
DEAR MOM: I don’t blame your son for avoiding individuals who cause him pain. Tell him that an apology that’s coerced is not any apology in any respect. A part of addiction recovery is the requirement to make amends to those the addict has wronged or hurt. Your husband has not done that, nor has your son’s brother. Proceed to go to your son so long as you may, but don’t allow him to involve you on this, since it won’t work.
DEAR ABBY: I’m being asked to donate to my grandchildren’s fundraisers for college activities like band, cheerleading, etc. This is occurring via email requests from a third-party site using their name. My issue is, I feel my grandchildren should ask me personally, or not less than warn me they’re raising money for his or her activity and I’ll be receiving an email. Am I improper to desire a personal request? — GROUCHY GRAN IN NEW MEXICO
DEAR GRAN: You aren’t improper. Nevertheless, this will likely be an instance of technology running amok. Once you receive a solicitation like this, pick up the phone, tell your grandchildren it showed up and make sure it’s legitimate. Make the conversation a friendly one and ask what’s happening with them, and should you feel like contributing, say so. At the tip of the conversation, remind them that you simply would love to listen to concerning the activity before receiving an automatic request for money.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also referred to as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
