As I used to be having coffee with a mom friend, I witnessed her pick up her phone with a sigh: “That’s my daughter’s second poo today, and it’s only 10 a.m.”
“I’m sorry?” I asked, just like the provincial idiot that I apparently am. “How do what number of poos she’s done?”
What she showed me next frankly blew my mind: a daycare app so detailed that it might put most patient medical charts in a hospital to shame.
‘Feedback on their kids in real time’
In real-time, my friend was receiving updates on absolutely every thing her child did, including (but not limited to!) what they ate, how much they ate, after they went to the bathroom, after they fell asleep, after they woke back up against and who they were twiddling with.
She was also being sent contemporaneous photos which she could scour for the slightest change in expression, outfit, or activity (“Oh,” she commented, as we were walking out of the cafe, “they’ve modified her pants!”)
I actually have two kids in daycare, and I actually have never seen anything prefer it.
From our daycare, I receive a weekly wrap-up, which sometimes – but not all the time – gets posted in the identical week that the events it depicts occurred.
I can’t deny that it’s useful to have an insight into what my kids are learning (not least so I actually have some context when my three-year-old son becomes suddenly OBSESSED with worms) and that it’s cute to see pictures of them twiddling with their friends.
But that’s about where my engagement with the daycare updates stops.
‘I actually have absolutely no interest’
If I’m honest, I don’t even take a look at all of them.
I only recently realized that this isn’t the norm.
Call me a foul parent, but I actually have absolutely no real interest in knowing what is occurring with my child while they’re at daycare.
I trust our daycare educators implicitly.
I don’t care what my kids are wearing, eating, or doing, or who they’re doing it with: I do know they’re within the hands of capable, smart, and type people.
I’m actually relieved not to know since the days my boys are in daycare are the one days after I can switch my mind off from the background chatter around toilet training, wet nappies and wake windows.
Barring an accident, an illness, or an unusually unhappy kid, I believe there may be a time and a spot for receiving details about your child’s day at daycare.
The time is “at pickup,” and the place is “contained in the center.”
Just take a step back
A straightforward whiteboard noting sleep and wake times is mostly sufficient, and an actual – gasp! – conversation with an educator can fill you in on the rest you should know.
I can’t help but think, too, that each moment an educator has an iPad of their hand for the good thing about a parent – whether that’s to take photos or send updates to an app – is a moment that they don’t have a hand free for a baby.
To be clear, I’m in no way criticizing the childcare staff here – I believe they’re a number of the most amazing, hardworking, and compassionate people I’ve ever met.
I do know the drive to offer this level of detail is coming from parents, and I believe that’s where the foundation of the issue lies.
I hear loads from teacher friends about how hard they find managing parent expectations for kindergarteners, and that makes plenty of sense: it’s no wonder parents have issues transitioning their kids to primary school after they’re used to being fed the literal minutiae of their kids’ days into the palms of their hands.
The best way I see it, it might profit everyone if we could just take a step back from the daycare apps, and remind ourselves that our children are in good hands – no matter how much information we get about them throughout the day.
So far as I’m concerned unless they’ve gastro, it’s absolutely none of my business how repeatedly my kids poo after I’m not with them.
And I’d wish to keep it that way.
As I used to be having coffee with a mom friend, I witnessed her pick up her phone with a sigh: “That’s my daughter’s second poo today, and it’s only 10 a.m.”
“I’m sorry?” I asked, just like the provincial idiot that I apparently am. “How do what number of poos she’s done?”
What she showed me next frankly blew my mind: a daycare app so detailed that it might put most patient medical charts in a hospital to shame.
‘Feedback on their kids in real time’
In real-time, my friend was receiving updates on absolutely every thing her child did, including (but not limited to!) what they ate, how much they ate, after they went to the bathroom, after they fell asleep, after they woke back up against and who they were twiddling with.
She was also being sent contemporaneous photos which she could scour for the slightest change in expression, outfit, or activity (“Oh,” she commented, as we were walking out of the cafe, “they’ve modified her pants!”)
I actually have two kids in daycare, and I actually have never seen anything prefer it.
From our daycare, I receive a weekly wrap-up, which sometimes – but not all the time – gets posted in the identical week that the events it depicts occurred.
I can’t deny that it’s useful to have an insight into what my kids are learning (not least so I actually have some context when my three-year-old son becomes suddenly OBSESSED with worms) and that it’s cute to see pictures of them twiddling with their friends.
But that’s about where my engagement with the daycare updates stops.
‘I actually have absolutely no interest’
If I’m honest, I don’t even take a look at all of them.
I only recently realized that this isn’t the norm.
Call me a foul parent, but I actually have absolutely no real interest in knowing what is occurring with my child while they’re at daycare.
I trust our daycare educators implicitly.
I don’t care what my kids are wearing, eating, or doing, or who they’re doing it with: I do know they’re within the hands of capable, smart, and type people.
I’m actually relieved not to know since the days my boys are in daycare are the one days after I can switch my mind off from the background chatter around toilet training, wet nappies and wake windows.
Barring an accident, an illness, or an unusually unhappy kid, I believe there may be a time and a spot for receiving details about your child’s day at daycare.
The time is “at pickup,” and the place is “contained in the center.”
Just take a step back
A straightforward whiteboard noting sleep and wake times is mostly sufficient, and an actual – gasp! – conversation with an educator can fill you in on the rest you should know.
I can’t help but think, too, that each moment an educator has an iPad of their hand for the good thing about a parent – whether that’s to take photos or send updates to an app – is a moment that they don’t have a hand free for a baby.
To be clear, I’m in no way criticizing the childcare staff here – I believe they’re a number of the most amazing, hardworking, and compassionate people I’ve ever met.
I do know the drive to offer this level of detail is coming from parents, and I believe that’s where the foundation of the issue lies.
I hear loads from teacher friends about how hard they find managing parent expectations for kindergarteners, and that makes plenty of sense: it’s no wonder parents have issues transitioning their kids to primary school after they’re used to being fed the literal minutiae of their kids’ days into the palms of their hands.
The best way I see it, it might profit everyone if we could just take a step back from the daycare apps, and remind ourselves that our children are in good hands – no matter how much information we get about them throughout the day.
So far as I’m concerned unless they’ve gastro, it’s absolutely none of my business how repeatedly my kids poo after I’m not with them.
And I’d wish to keep it that way.
