DEAR ABBY: I’m in a three-year relationship, but my companion, “Ron,” is amazingly cautious about emotional attachment. It took him two years to inform me he loves me and even to specific any form of significant affection. As well as, he’s consumed by his job and worries about how his co-workers perceive him. He seems to prioritize work relationships over our relationship.
Because I actually have been depressed by the meager affection he shows me, I started an intimate relationship with a former co-worker, “Dan.” Dan expresses no reservations or restraint in his feelings for me. He makes me feel appreciated, beautiful and loved.
I actually have strong feelings for them each and realize I actually have created a horrible situation. I don’t wish to abandon a stable, caring relationship that was cultivated over three years, and I’m terrified that ending the connection in favor of 1 with Dan can be something I’ll regret later. But I’m unwilling to interrupt things off with Dan. I’d appreciate any advice. — TWO-TIMER ON THE EAST COAST
DEAR ‘TWO-TIMER’: I’ll try. Because your relationship with Ron left you feeling so empty that you simply went on the lookout for solace in one other man’s arms, ask yourself whether you actually love Ron or simply the challenge of getting him to finally commit to you. You’re unwilling to provide Dan up because he gives you affection and validation, that are vital in a long-term relationship.
Recognize that you simply are cheating on each men, which is fair to neither one — and don’t think that Ron won’t discover. If you desire to spend your life with an emotionally unavailable workaholic, do the honorable thing and break up with Dan. If what you could have been getting from Dan is more vital to you, well, you already know the drill.
DEAR ABBY: My oldest daughter recently had her first child. She sent out christening invitations a month early after clearing the date with the godparents, church and venue.
My youngest adult daughter, who has two children and lives nearby, declined the invite. (She isn’t the godparent.) Her reason was that she and her family had tickets to a ballgame on the identical day because the christening. I suggested that only she attend and have one other relative go to the sport in her place, but was told she needs to be at the sport along with her family. Your thoughts? — PRIORITIES IN FLORIDA
DEAR PRIORITIES: My first thought is that your younger daughter ranks her love of sports above her love for her sister. My second thought is that her priorities are out of whack. Could there be bad blood between them? Long after that ballgame is over and forgotten, the memory of her absence at that vital family event might be remembered by the relatives she snubbed.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also often known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
DEAR ABBY: I’m in a three-year relationship, but my companion, “Ron,” is amazingly cautious about emotional attachment. It took him two years to inform me he loves me and even to specific any form of significant affection. As well as, he’s consumed by his job and worries about how his co-workers perceive him. He seems to prioritize work relationships over our relationship.
Because I actually have been depressed by the meager affection he shows me, I started an intimate relationship with a former co-worker, “Dan.” Dan expresses no reservations or restraint in his feelings for me. He makes me feel appreciated, beautiful and loved.
I actually have strong feelings for them each and realize I actually have created a horrible situation. I don’t wish to abandon a stable, caring relationship that was cultivated over three years, and I’m terrified that ending the connection in favor of 1 with Dan can be something I’ll regret later. But I’m unwilling to interrupt things off with Dan. I’d appreciate any advice. — TWO-TIMER ON THE EAST COAST
DEAR ‘TWO-TIMER’: I’ll try. Because your relationship with Ron left you feeling so empty that you simply went on the lookout for solace in one other man’s arms, ask yourself whether you actually love Ron or simply the challenge of getting him to finally commit to you. You’re unwilling to provide Dan up because he gives you affection and validation, that are vital in a long-term relationship.
Recognize that you simply are cheating on each men, which is fair to neither one — and don’t think that Ron won’t discover. If you desire to spend your life with an emotionally unavailable workaholic, do the honorable thing and break up with Dan. If what you could have been getting from Dan is more vital to you, well, you already know the drill.
DEAR ABBY: My oldest daughter recently had her first child. She sent out christening invitations a month early after clearing the date with the godparents, church and venue.
My youngest adult daughter, who has two children and lives nearby, declined the invite. (She isn’t the godparent.) Her reason was that she and her family had tickets to a ballgame on the identical day because the christening. I suggested that only she attend and have one other relative go to the sport in her place, but was told she needs to be at the sport along with her family. Your thoughts? — PRIORITIES IN FLORIDA
DEAR PRIORITIES: My first thought is that your younger daughter ranks her love of sports above her love for her sister. My second thought is that her priorities are out of whack. Could there be bad blood between them? Long after that ballgame is over and forgotten, the memory of her absence at that vital family event might be remembered by the relatives she snubbed.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also often known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
